How to Coach Young Adult Fiction with an Asexual Character
Today’s blog post comes to us from certified book coach and Author Accelerator Certification Manager Margaret McNellis.
Margaret McNellis
Certified book coach and author
I was working my way through my practicum work to apply for book coach certification. The third and final practicum was all about helping a writer prepare to pitch agents. This was the one I was most nervous about because I not only had some imposter syndrome around pitching (considering I’d pitched a novel and gotten rejection after rejection after rejection), but also because I was still new to book coaching.
So I went to my network of friends and fellow writers, preferring to work with someone I knew instead of a stranger. I was on the hunt for someone who had a manuscript they thought was ready to pitch. The manuscript had to be around 75k words, and it had to be a genre I was interested in.
I found a fellow alumna of my MFA program who’d written a YA historical fantasy manuscript, and I jumped at the opportunity to coach them through the process of pitching.
My first task was to read the manuscript, which was indeed in fairly good shape. There was just one issue I identified: The protagonist was giving me asexual vibes but it was coming through on the page as coldness toward everyone regardless of the type of relationship they had.
My First Foray Into Coaching This Book
I knew before my writer could pitch, we’d have to talk about this. It’s fine to have a character who is cold to others, but there has to be a reason. And, as an asexual person who had just recently come out, I was hyper aware that even though I’m asexual, I am a mush pot when it comes to people in my life I care about.
If my friends are hurting, I’m right there with them. (As a Pisces moon, I’m already fairly porous when it comes to emotion, and I checked that part of myself and decided to get curious about this manuscript.)
When my writer and I spoke, I started out by asking how the protagonist felt about other characters they encountered, one at a time.
We landed on the opposite of cold – this protagonist loved, and loved deeply… just not in a sexual way.
So my writer and I talked about those emotions, those relationships, and I made space for them to brainstorm around how to show those emotions while still making it clear the character was asexual. At the time my writer’s book took place, asexuality was understood on a biological level, but not on a human or relationship level.
We talked about this and how to make it clear to readers that the protagonist is asexual without using the term, since it wouldn’t have been used in that way at the time of the story.
I was able to use my own writing experience with my debut novel, The Red Fletch, to help my writer work through this, but I also used what I’d learned about book coaching. I stayed curious. (There’s also a great scene in Ted Lasso about curiosity versus judgment – disclaimer: there is some colorful language in this scene.)
I asked questions. Lots of questions. And my writer was able to figure out what they wanted to change in their book while still staying in the driver’s seat.
This curiosity is at the heart of book coaching, and it came back into play again, later in this practicum work.
Agent Research
Part of the practicum required me to research a list of agents for my writer. I knew they were worried about their book finding a home with an agent because it was not only crossing into more than one genre (historical + fantasy), but it was a YA without romance.
Back in early 2021, there weren’t many books on the shelves that fit this description.
After 8 hours of research, after reading about over 400 agents, I came up with a list of 30 I thought could be a good fit for my writer.
When we came back to meet together and discuss those agents, one of the questions I asked was, “If you had to choose between an agent who reps historical and who reps fantasy, which would you pick?”
This was because many agents I found would rep one and not the other.
But my other question was, “How would you feel pitching a YA agent whose entire client list has books that have romance in them as a subplot?”
This was a key question. I’d left out agents from my list who talked online about loving YA books that featured heavily on romance, but not all agents talked about their preferences there, so we had to look to the books they represented in the past.
My writer wasn’t totally opposed to it. Why? Because of two reasons:
We put them in the last tier of agents to query so that those whose previous clients had published YA books that did not feature heavily on romance would be pitched first, and,
We’d fleshed out how to create meaningful relationships and subplots in spite of - or should I say in celebration of - the fact that there was no romance in my writer’s manuscript.
My writer felt more comfortable going forward. They came in feeling like there’d be no agents for them. They came in feeling lost. They came in feeling like there was no space in the world of publishing for their story unless they forced it back into the proverbial closet.
By the time we were working on writing the query letter and synopsis, they felt like there could be room for their book after all. They felt like they didn’t have to keep the book in the closet. They felt motivated to revise.
What Happened Next?
The last time this writer and I talked about their manuscript, I think they still hadn’t queried it. But that’s okay – because while they came to me with querying as the goal they thought they wanted, I think what they were actually looking for was a path forward to write a story that felt true to them.
A story that answered a deep why in their core.
I think they wanted to know there was a path forward to bring the book into the wider world. I think they thought I’d tell them they had to change their book to add a romantic subplot so that it fit.
I think they thought a story about an asexual character, a type of story so needed, especially among YA readers, wouldn’t be welcome among the gatekeepers in the publishing industry.
But after working through a pitch package together, my writer left with more confidence – not only in their manuscript, but in themselves and their own instincts as a storyteller.
Often, the thing we think is blocking us isn’t the real block. There’s something deeper. What we think we seek isn’t our real goal. There’s something rooted in us that we’re looking for and a book can be the key that unlocks that path for us.
Success can be defined in so many different ways, and sometimes, writing and revising the book to completion is enough.
Perhaps my writer is querying agents or still plans to. Perhaps they’ve found representation or even an editor (though if they have, they’ve kept fairly quiet about it on social media). That may feel like the brass ring, but a book coach cannot promise that outcome.
What we can deliver on is increased confidence. We can open doors to possibilities with the craft of writing. We can hold space for writers to make discoveries about themselves, their books, and their own goals. We can give them the strength to take control of their writing and their stories, and give them the megaphone so they can raise their voices.
I don’t offer pitch packages because it’s not my favorite part of the process to coach in, but that doesn’t mean I didn’t find value in coaching this writer through their pitch package. I found immense value in it because they came to me anxious over their book and they left feeling confident.
What greater writer transformation can a book coach hope for?
I would love to someday see my writer’s book on the shelves, because I think that YA needs more asexual stories. I’ve talked with young readers who are thirsting to see this in fiction so they can identify with it or understand it.
I’d also love to see more asexuality in books for adults because there’s an absence of understanding among that demographic, too, where asexuality is concerned.
Overall, despite being a hopeless romantic myself, I love when a story doesn’t center around romance or even include it. There are many relationships in our lives which enrich our hearts.
The job of a book coach – regardless of genre – is to help the writer keep control of their story but to also connect with the reader.
